can you miss someone who's still with you?

my head's throbbing from a headache. spent some time at mp library just now. want to read stuff. have to start cultivating a reading habit. never too late huh. wanted to read up on philosophy so borrowed a couple of books which didn't look too boring. oh also remembered i still owe kwok $20 from long ago. when i think of vj, there're many things i'd think about. some i'd never forget. ahh headache is painful, i stop. and get some sleep.

confusion seems to be a common thing. sometimes i just don't know what i want. anyhow, got good for math. very good. haha. at least i'm happy with it. good job. had wanted to do more well in these common tests. next big one up is really big. lotsa pressure and i'd better deliver. least i put pressure on myself. quite a blank day today. tomorrow doesn't look like it'll be any different.

this is one of my favourite songs. acoustic one. recently it's taken on a new meaning, kinda.

So lately, been wondering
Who will be there to take my place
When I'm gone, you'll need love
To light the shadows on your face
If a great wave should fall
It would fall upon us all
And between the sand and stone
Could you make it on your own

If I could, then I would
I'll go wherever you will go
Way up high or down low
I'll go wherever you will go

And maybe, I'll find out
The way to make it back someday
To watch you, to guide you
Through the darkest of your days
If a great wave should fall
It would fall upon us all
Well I hope there's someone out there
Who can bring me back to you

If I could, then I would
I'll go wherever you will go
Way up high or down low
I'll go wherever you will go

Runaway with my heart
Runaway with my hope
Runaway with my love

I know now, just quite how
My life and love might still go on
In your heart and your mind
I'll stay with you for all of time

If I could, then I would
I'll go wherever you will go
Way up high or down low
I'll go wherever you will go

If I could turn back time
I'll go wherever you will go
If I could make you mine
I'll go wherever you will go

well done rj swim team. double gold! pity i wasn't there. hwy, it's nice to be on the winning side. continue the good work! anyway why i wasn't there was because we were supposed to have some gryphons cup training which turned up wtf.. so played some and it felt good. i could still play a little! waa.
31 july is gona be one busy day. have to attend college day. not sue i'll go though. signed up for cip. and just remembered i have gryphons cup on that day too. hmm, what the sht. so, the last one will probably be the priority.. who gives a shit about college day anyway? but it's gonna be tricky. which could have been made more complicated if i had gone for the st scholarship talks too. speaking of talks, there's the medicine university talk, the rj one, that i want to attend. but i have got to go cmpb for checkup on that day as well. damn, i'll see what i can do. why did cmpb change the date in the first place.. sheesh.
during the last gp lesson in class, the teacher was telling us that the chasing of a girl is the part. and when you've finaly caught up with her, and then what? i suppose that's not entirely true but there're bits of truth in that. whatever, maybe i'm not in a position to comment.

today, i walked a walk that was simply beautiful.

hmm these days i feel like i'm just going through the motions. like studying and stuff. wonder where the excitement's gone. i mean right now..hmm maybe it's that there's nothing to look forward to. unlike previously. for example last term i had many dreams. dunnoe already. dreams come and go. and come. dreams are what make one's life worth living. certain dreams can never be fulfilled i guess. this is tough. but then is this enough reason to let go? i don't know, but i know that there is no reason why i should stop dreaming.

it's painful not being able to do anything. not even for your own happiness. i suppose if it remains an emptiness, it's just that.

spent the last 2 hours doing a redo of a compo i screwed up big time for ct. my gp grades are worrying, disastrous even. maybe if i swallowed the whole book of gp power, it'll help a little. but i doubt it. anyhow, physics wasn't good too. but i knew i screwed it up this time. ok, so the two not so confident subjects are back. hope the remaining two works out fine. oh yeah, my head's still cray after writing(or attempting to) a bit about marriage and love. woa. what the heck is love? what constitutes love? tough tough, i'm no expert. life's a journey. ok screw, you know there're actually ppl who bet on what phrases a commentator would use in a soccer match? wtf. that's interesting. speaking of which, it's cool to start off the day with two soccer matches, like yesterday. though the copa america is not half as exciting as euro. too bad.i want to start revising already. darn, talking is tonnes easier than the process. ok, shut up and sleep.